Another Bad Day? Sick of Feeling Glum? Why Feeling Good is ALWAYS an Inside Job…
I have a morning routine.
It involves tea, meditation and setting my intentions for the day (in no particular order).
Sometimes my intentions are colorful and adventurous, sometimes they’re just simple. And many are repeated daily. One in particular:
“Today I intend to feel GOOD!” AS much as possible, anyway.
Yup, this intention is key. It’s always at the top of the list. A priority.
Because I know that it’s MY CHOICE to feel good. Or not. Me feeling good is NEVER dependent on anything outside of me. Ever.
I know, it sounds righteous. And noble. But I didn’t always understand this concept. In fact, most of my life was spent trying to control my outer environment. My physical reality. In order to feel better.
When I finished high school (way, way back), I studied to be a Medical Technologist. In my little corner of the planet, that’s someone who works in a pathology lab and tests human bits and pieces for bugs or abnormalities. It’s really interesting stuff!
A few years later, fresh out of college and eager to finally earn a paycheck, I officially entered the workforce. Woohoo!
Luck was on my side and I landed a position in a small state-owned lab in a small town.
I jumped at the challenge with naked enthusiasm, ready to dazzle the world with my new-found brilliance. And life as a newly-employed citizen rocked. For a few months, anyway.
Because my paycheck was measly. Very measly. I was working for the state, remember.
I made enough to survive, but not enough for life’s little comforts. And it bothered me. And I started feeling unhappy. My enthusiasm slowly melted away. To be replaced by dissatisfaction. And resentment.
I couldn’t fault the job. It was challenging and interesting. My colleagues were great too. But I stopped noticing those things. Or appreciating them.
Instead I felt exploited. I was working long hours. I deserved more! Didn’t I?
It consumed my thoughts. Completely.
And it wasn’t long before going to work became a chore. Something I soon came to detest. And I thought “if I earned more, I would feel happy!”
I decided that moving to the private sector would be the answer. They always paid better. And as a lowly junior it wasn’t hard to find a new position.
Except this time, it was at a BIG lab. In the city. And they doubled my meagre earnings! Brilliant!
Actually, it wasn’t.